A Wedding Sermon

As you prepare for a wedding, here are some key principles to work with…

 

1. How would it feel to be there?
   
   If you're the couple, you're probably nervous. Have I made the right decision? Or should I have held out for Susan? Will all the arrangements work out? And what about tonight! If you're a guest, you're interested in the couple, and maybe quite excited. There's a celebratory buzz in the air.
   
2. Catch and Release
   As preacher, remember that people are not here to hear you! The main business on their minds is the marriage. Remember again, when you've got a captive audience, LET THEM GO … don't take advantage of their presence by ram-rodding them with the gospel, or by being provocative, or by saying everything you ever wanted to say in one sitting.
   
3. Say something helpful to everyone
   While you'll be aiming to give wise words of counsel to the happy couple, aim your words at everyone.
   
4. Be Brief
   I generally aim for a five to seven minute sermon with a single catchy point. It's also good to be light, humorous at times, and optimistic.
   
5. Emphasise Love as Commitment and Service
   It's probably so obvious that it doesn't need saying, but Christian love is about sacrificial service. That's a good gospel connection, and the thing we need to exhort people towards.
   

 

What to Preach?

People often ask for 1 Corinthians 13. Bear in mind, it's not a passage about ROMANTIC LOVE. Ephesians 5 is helpful, not so much for the emphasis on wives submitting to husbands, as of the husband giving himself up for his wife. In general, I will preach on whatever passage is requested.

 

Sample Sermon

Romans 12:1-18

 

What's it going to take… to make this marriage work?

It's a good question, and I'm glad you asked it. Because marriage is TOUGH WORK.

During the week I saw the movie THE INCREDIBLES. If you're not up to date, it's an animated movie about a RETIRED SUPER HERO. Mr Incredible. And apart from the great animation and the cool superhero stuff, in the end it was a movie that had a lot to say about MARRIAGE. And FAMILY.

Mr Incredible is so busy saving the world that he's late for his own wedding. As they're finally about to take their vows, HELEN, his bride, says to him under her breath, "To make this marriage work, you're going to have to be MUCH MORE than MR INCREDIBLE." 

Which anyone here who's married already will know is painfully true. You can leap tall buildings in a single bound. You can be a ROCK STAR. You can be an incredible achiever in every way. But it takes MORE THAN THAT to make a marriage.

Because marriage, in the final analysis, is about the end of YOU. And the beginning of US.

Which is very much what we've just read about in Romans chapter 12. It's not a passage so much about marriage… as about living in response to the LORD JESUS. Which the Apostle Paul says elsewhere is the model for how we treat one another. In the lead up to the passage we've read, he's talking about the SACRIFICE OF JESUS at the cross. From Romans 12 verse 1, he's talking about OUR RESPONSE. Which is to make yourself not a SUPER HERO… but a LIVING SACRIFICE.

He says, IN VIEW OF GOD'S INCREDIBLE MERCY TO YOU, in view of the fact that God considers you RIGHTEOUS because of what Jesus has done, in view of God's mercy, offer your bodies as living sacrifices… holy, and pleasing to God. And this, he says, rather than any amount of songs you sing in church, rather than any number of times you say hallelujah and wave your hands about, this SACRIFICING OF YOURSELF is your SPIRITUAL ACT OF WORSHIP.

The way you PUT YOURSELF ASIDE… the way you SERVE… the way you SACRIFICE SELF. That's the New Testament definition of the sort of WORSHIP God's interested in.

Which the rest of the passage goes on to unpack in a very practical way. Don't think of yourself more highly than you ought to. Love each other SINCERELY. Hate evil… and hang on to the good.

All linking back to the words THEREFORE IN VIEW OF GOD'S MERCY in verse 1. BECAUSE God has been merciful to you, hate evil. Like God does. BECAUSE od has been merciful to you, CLING TO THE GOOD. BECAUSE God has been merciful to you, be devoted to one another in love.

Because God has been merciful to you, Honour one another ABOVE YOURSELVES.

BECAUSE God has been merciful to you, verse 12,
Be joyful in hope, be patient in affliction. And you need to know in your marriage, hard times are going to come.

BECAUSE God has been merciful to you, Paul says in verse 13,¹³Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

It's because of the way God has been merciful to us, that we Christians are going to BLESS when we're treated unfairly. Even in marriage. Instead of looking for the subtle opportunity for PAYBACK. We're going to rejoice with one another, grieve with one another. It's not by being incredible ACHEIVERS on a personal level that you can make a marriage work. It's because of God's mercy to us in CHRIST…. that we can live in harmony and humility with one another.

Phil and Emma, as you start your married life today I want to urge you to keep on SERVING THE LORD together. I want to urge you to keep looking at GOD'S MERCY TO YOU in Christ as he died on the cross… as the model and the MOTIVE for your marriage.

"To make this marriage work, you're going to have to be MUCH MORE than MR and MRS INCREDIBLE." You're going to have to be people who live in the SHADOW OF GOD'S MERCY every day. And because of that make yourselves LIVING SACRIFICES. Which means you're going to have to be people who learn to put THE OTHER FIRST… as you've promised to do in your vows. And then keep on living to serve others as well.

I know that's your plan. And I know that's your COMMITMENT. And I'm confident as you go forward that because of your commitment to the Lord Jesus, you're going to have an INCREDIBLE MARRIAGE.

Let's pray.